Better value footballers’ drives at Autoquake.com
Cars and footballers go together like commentators and clichés, so to celebrate the England team’s qualification for the 2010 FIFA World Cup, Autoquake has named the perfect cars for Capello’s men to put on their driveways.
“We’ve picked out cars to suit the players’ characters on and off the pitch,” said Autoquake CEO, Garry Hobson, “and unlike most footballers’ wheels, our starting 11 is great value for money.”
Goal keeper: David James
He might be in his fortieth year, but the on-off England keeper seems to be getting better with age, rather like the Mazda MX-5. This classic sports car has been around since 1989 and improves with each new generation. Just like David James, only a lot more reliable.
Defenders: Ashley Cole, Rio Ferdinand, Glen Johnson, John Terry
Poor Ashley Cole. One of the world’s best left backs, but hard to like. How about a BMW 3 Series, Ashley? A great car, but nobody will let you out into traffic.
No more expensive mistakes, Rio. Try something cheap that won’t let you down, like a Honda Jazz, and remember to look over your shoulder – on the road and on the pitch.
Glen Johnson’s always speeding forwards when he needs to hold back. Try a hot hatch like the Mini Cooper, Glen.
Hard. That’s the word which comes to mind when describing John Terry, but remember those tears after the missed penalty in the Champions League final? A Volvo XC90 is as tough as they come but not afraid to show its feelings.
Midfielders: David Beckham, Steven Gerrard, Frank Lampard, Aaron Lennon
Officially he may be an LA Galaxy player, but it’s no secret Beckham wants to play in Italy. How about an Alfa Romeo 159 for the long drive, David?
Steven Gerrard’s a classy player with a surefooted touch in all conditions. We’d recommend a Land Rover Freelander.
Until Capello came along, no coach could mesh the similar playing styles of Gerrard and Frank Lampard. Is it a cop out to suggest another Land Rover Freelander?
Aaron Lennon may be small, but what he lacks in size he makes up in speed. Just like Citroën’s half-pint hot-hatch, the C2 VTS.
Forwards: Peter Crouch, Wayne Rooney
He moves with the grace of a new-born giraffe, but Peter Crouch can score goals. He needs a limo with plenty of legroom, like the BMW 7 Series.
Few forwards are as quick and committed as Rooney, but he’s no male model. Drive a Mazda RX-8 and all eyes will be on the car, not the man behind the wheel.
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