Is Divorce the Best Thing for the Kids?
We often forget our own needs as moms and dads when it comes to considering getting an online divorce. But in so doing, we may actually be doing a disservice to the happiness of the kids themselves. Divorce can be a healthy option for all involved.
It’s a tough question, and aside from questions about finances (or lack thereof) it’s the most asked question about online divorce and offline divorce alike—is divorce really the best thing for the kids?
Many times our faith, our family, our friends, our upbringing, or some other factor will weigh in, influencing us to put off divorce for one more month, one more year, or until after the kids have graduated, gotten married, and so on. Milestone after milestone, we find ourselves yoked to a commitment that no longer meets our wants or needs, but we stay because we’re living under the impression that the best thing for our children is to stay married. But is that true?
In a May 2012 article, Dr. Shoshana Benett suggested, “When Mommy and Daddy are happier as individuals, their kids will be too. When there’s ugliness between the couple, no one’s happy. Once the halves of the couple move on and find their grounding, each one as an individual has the opportunity to be happier than ever. When children have a happy mom and dad, they’ll do much better.”
That’s one of the core critical elements that may make getting an online divorce a viable option for couples with children. Happiness, even if it occurs as an individual rather than as a couple, is a lot healthier, and unfortunately what we find is that unhappiness has a deeper, harder hitting impact on young ones.
WebMD Health News writer Salynn Boyles suggests, “Mothers in high-conflict marriages may be less caring toward their children, more unpredictable and harsh in administering discipline, and may use more guilt- and anxiety-inducing techniques than mothers in low-conflict marriages. And fathers in combative marriages are more likely to withdraw from their parenting role.” So we find that in the end, getting a divorce online or off can become just what the doctor ordered—literally.
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